A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

"Interesting" People At Planet Fitness

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

I just want to put a disclaimer on this post... I really DO like all the weird/wacky/crazy/interesting people that make their way into Planet Fitness on any given day. I am sort of making fun of them here, but I genuinely enjoy (for the most part) all the different characters I encounter at the gym.

Onward!

I was at Planet Fitness on Saturday. It was soooooo crowded- my own fault for going at such a high traffic time. But lots of people means lots of interesting characters for me to tell you about! I love to people watch, especially at the gym. 

This is who I saw on Saturday...




I didn't even know what this guy was wearing until I got home. He was running on the treadmill in some sort of gas mask contraption. Google told me it was the Training Mask 2.0, which is apparently supposed to (according to their website) increase lung capacity, increase anaerobic threshold, increase oxygen capacity, increase energy production, increase mental and physical stamina, and increase mental focus. It basically increases everything... especially the amount of people staring at you.



Winky Guy will find any excuse to interrupt your workout to talk to you. He will also wink as many times as possible during this conversation. You think about asking him if he has something in his eye, but you'd rather just end the annoying interaction as quickly as possible.



This is the guy that places his water bottle and his towel on a machine. Sure, he will get off it between sets, but he stands right there, and has pretty much laid all his worldly possessions on the machine to stake his claim. On Saturday, Hog the Machine Guy also happened to be Winky Guy, so I did not ask to work in...



This woman on the treadmill... She did not have short legs, but she had the smallest stride I ever saw in my life! I know there are all sorts of different strides, and I urge people to just run in a way that feels natural to them. But there was nothing natural about what was going on on that treadmill.



Speaking of interesting strides, there was also a Tippy Toe Runner! There is a Tippy Toe Runner that runs through our neighborhood (Paul calls him The Hopper). But this was a different Tippy Toe Runner. They are OUT there, people!



Are these guys at your gym? There is a pair of them at Planet Fitness. Instead of carrying around a normal water bottle, they carry gallon jugs of water around with them. That's a lot of water to be consuming during a workout. I would think it would be more beneficial to start hydrating before the workout rather than drink it during. But that's just me. And I am not about to give them unsolicited advice.

Which of course brings me to the last person...



This is the one person on my list in which  I cannot find any redeeming qualities. Unsolicited Advice Douche (who I will from now on call UAD) is always a guy. And he's usually giving the UA to a girl. Because, you know, we love when stranger-men talk to us. (Stranger-men term stolen from Ali!)

So here is my story about UAD from Saturday:

I was there to lift back and legs. I was almost done with my workout and was planning to do a couple more assisted pull ups with a different grip. However, the machine was in use, so I went to another area that has a huge contraption that includes lots of bars to do pull ups on. Since I was going to have to do pull ups with NO assistance, I didn't know how it would go. Normally I can bang out 3 at the beginning of a workout. But at this point I was at the end  of my workout...

So I jumped up, grabbed the bars, and proceeded to do three complete unassisted pull ups. I was pretty dang proud of myself and stood there for a few seconds to take a breather and give it another go. Just then, a dude (oops, I mean UAD) was trying to get my attention. I couldn't hear him because I had my headphones on. I paused my podcast and thought to myself, Uh oh, here we go. What the hell does this guy possibly have to say to me?

UAD pointed to a resistance band hanging right next to the spot I was doing my pull ups. "You know, you can hang the resistance band in a certain way so that you can do assisted pull ups," he said.

DID HE NOT JUST SEE ME DO A COUPLE PULL UPS WITHOUT ASSISTANCE!!??

It took me a second to decide how to respond. I could just smile and say thanks or I could respond in a way that would reflect my annoyance. I chose the latter.

With a deadpan face, I said: "I'm aware."

He shrugged and kind of rolled his eyes in a way that said, "Geez, sorry, I was trying to help".

It annoys me. I don't need his help. This guy doesn't know me at ALL, and he was trying to assist in my workout. WTF????

WHAT MAKES GUYS THINK WE NEED THEIR HELP/INPUT/ASSISTANCE/COMMENTS AT THE GYM??????

It's so freaking insulting and I am sick of it. I am sure you can tell from my anger that this isn't the first time something like this happened. I am at the point where if a guy tries to give me gym advice, he will be rewarded with snark.


Oh by the way, I won't let myself off the hook on this one. I'm sure there is crap I do at the gym that makes me an "interesting" person. On Saturday, people were surely calling me...



Look, I don't always have time to shave, okay!!!!????
Tell me about someone "interesting" at your gym!
What would YOUR interesting trait be?

25 comments:

  1. Other than the fact that you had to encounter a UAD, I really enjoyed this post and all of your clever titles for your experiences people watching...lol. I totally have names for the people at my gym too! Some include, "Super flexible girl" "Really muscular lady" "The Lulu girl" ***and a few others I can't include since they don't seem very nice. I wish I could bang out 3 Unassisted pull-ups! I was so proud of myself this summer when I did 1! LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooh I want to be Super Flexible Girl. That's way more sexy than armpit hair girl! 1 pull up is AWESOME! I think it is harder to get from 0 to 1 than to get from 1 to multiple. Keep going. It took me over 2 years.

      Delete
  2. Haha! I wish there were more weirdos at my gym so I didn't feel so out of place. Everyone there is basically gym barbie: perfect glossy hair in a flawless ponytail, smooth tan skin, expensive workout clothes, and look like they could seamlessly go from their workout to a nightclub. I'm more akin to Armpit Hair Girl, except for me it's Leg Hair Girl Who Hopes No One Looks Close Enough To Notice.

    Maybe I'm just lucky, or don't go to the gym enough, but I have never been approached by a dude at the gym. I've been at this gym for 2 years and every time I'm there, most guys just go about their business and no one really talks to each other, which is more than fine by me. I've never gotten Winky Guy either...but maybe that's because of the aforementioned leg hair? LOL!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HAHA! Maybe I should have lifted my arms up over my head and stretched to scare Winky Guy off!

      Planet Fitness sounds like the opposite of your gym in the fact that most people don't like "Perfect". I mean, you have the HS and college kids that dress up for the gym, but most people who go there are "older" (like me ha!) and just want to get shit done.

      The only guys that talk to me at the gym are 50 or older. ONCE a guy my age hit on me. ONCE. I had my gloves on so he didn't see my wedding ring, and apparently didn't see my armpit hair either.

      Delete
  3. I am sure there is a Hog the Machine Guy at every gym. Just the other day I encountered a Hog Three Things at Once Guy. He placed his water bottle on one bench, his towel on another bench and then proceeded to use the smith machine. He then alternated between all three for about 25 minutes until I was just like, F this guy and took one of his benches. Ain't no body got time to be polite and "work in" with someone who is hogging the entire weights area of the gym!

    I was doing chest press once and struggling with my *last rep* and a guy looked over and said, "you could try using a lower weight." Mmm okay. I had no idea that was a possibility because I'm just a dumb girl. THANKS UAD!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OMG I WOULD HAVE PUNCHED HIM. I would have been like, "The last rep is SUPPOSED to be difficult you dumb idiot."

      Hog 3 machines at ones guy.... people really have balls, don't they!?

      Delete
    2. OMG it's clear that guy knows nothing about lifting and should NOT be giving out advice!!

      Delete
  4. Ugh the guys who carry around the gallons of water and the UAD are the reason I stay far, far away from the gym. I just can't bring myself to face them. I would probably be the girl who sweats a lot. I seriously sweat a ridiculous amount. Really attractive.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I sweat a lot too! Especially because my gym is sort of hot and stuffy.

      Delete
  5. THis is a funny post. I think I would be called the crazy lady who sweats A LOT! We have a tip-toe runner lady I see frequently and I call her "tiny dancer", and then there is "glove guy", "the Ninja"... I think people would call me something like "pink lady"--I always wear fluorescent pink because I like pink, and prefer NOT to be hit by a car.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tiny dancer- that is FUNNY! I told Paul and he laughed. :)

      Delete
  6. "Hey lady, I just had to share my brilliance and wisdom because obviously as a GIRL you don't know how to 1. ask for advice if you want it, or 2. actually do the workout yu want to do! You should APPRECIATE that I took the time out of my flexing in the mirror to bother you and piss you off at the end of your workout!"

    Seriously, I hate dudes like this. I'm a freaking independent woman and if I need help, I'll ASK for it!

    Also, I ran a race near a tip-toe runner once. Very odd. I have tiny strides; I hope someday to widen them!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have a cute little stride! I saw it on a video Matt made. The lady at the gym had a smaller stride than yours and I know this because I did not have a gut reaction when I saw your's. When I saw her's I was like... DANG how does she DO THAT?

      The funny thing is, the guy giving me advice... I was more fit than him. I got the feeling that he maybe *just* got into lifting for the first time ever or after a substantial amount of time off and just wanted to flirt with the armpit hair lady.

      Delete
  7. I NEED that mask. I really like to creep everyone out and I REALLY enjoy drawing attention to myself. Isn't the best way to breathe better while running is to just run more...? I mean...

    I HATE UAD. They are so annoying. I have a really good resting bitch face which scares the shit out of everyone, so I don't get it a whole lot. I also tend to go at the same time every day which seems to be old people hour and not a whole lot of douche bags. I've also been training with a very large man who is also a little scary (even though he's the nicest person on the planet), so that deters people from talking to me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I normally go at old people hour too. OPH hehehe. That is awesome you have a lifting buddy. I wish I had someone to spot me.

      Delete
  8. This is flippin hilarious lol. First I've seen Mask girl out on the trails and it scared the crap out of me. Second, UAD is sooooo annoying, they do that to guys too trust me. Lastly, I'm gallon water guy, I take it everywhere so I make sure to drink the whole thing, thanks for calling me out lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for getting my sense of humor and not being offended at the call out! ;)

      I would be scared too if I saw mask guy anywhere other than on a treadmill at the gym. :)

      Delete
  9. Haha this post had me cracking up!! I don't make it to the gym too often any more but I know that I have seen most of these characters as well! I think that is part of the reason why I avoid the gym and only take group fitness classes. I never liked having to share workout equipment with others!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Totally understandable. It can be frustrating. Now workout classes... you should write a post about the people you see there! :)

      Delete
  10. HaHa - love the names for various people at your gym!!!
    I'm not a fan of someone giving me unwanted advice anywhere - gym or otherwise:) You handled that very nicely!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Kim! No more Mr. Nice Megan. It's going to be snark all the way from now on.

      Delete
  11. I have training mask guy at my gym lol - he never takes it off, it's like working out next to Darth Vader x's 10! I am lucky, I also have booty shorts to the extreme, 60 year old woman who can't wait to talk to everyone at my gym. I have a few gallon jug guys who are at the gym for the long haul lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I didn't know training masks were so popular! I am intrigued. Booty shorts to the extreme... okay, that may be me! (as you can see from the picture hehe) 60 yr old woman who can't wait to talk to everyone.... THAT IS FREAKING HILARIOUS!!!!

      Delete
  12. Great things you’ve always shared with us. Just keep writing this kind of posts.The time which was wasted in traveling for tuition now it can be used for studies.Thanks phenq reviews

    ReplyDelete
  13. Interesting post. I Have Been wondering about this issue, so thanks for posting. Pretty cool post.It 's really very nice and Useful post.Thanks Mark

    ReplyDelete