A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

So I had a break down the other day...

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
I promised you all an update on my knee/hip situation. Seeing as how I had a breakdown on Monday night about the situation I am in, now is as good of a time as any to let you know what is going on.

**Sorry if there are errors in the post. I am only checking it once for mistakes because it is too depressing to read over and over again.**

The short story on my hip is that as long as I am careful, I am seeing an improvement in it, which is really good. I am hopefully about the hip.

Now, onto the knee...


Here is some quick history about my knee...

July, 2013- I started to have on again/off again pain around my knee. It would ache when sitting, driving, etc.

October, 2013- Sought help from a doctor at OIP. Had an x-ray and MRI. Diagnosis: I had inflammation in my knee. Was given a brace, went to PT for a few weeks, and used anti inflammation cream. Doctor thought I had plica syndrome, and you could actually feel the tissue moving over the bone around my knee. The plica could be causing inflammation.

December, 2013- Quit PT because my PT was useless. Went to see a different PT who knew more about runners. Had my gait analyzed. I went there for several weeks but it didn't really help.

January, 2014- Nothing was working. Knee was in a perpetual state of aching. Running bothered it. Lifting bothered it. Went back to my doctor at OIP. Had surgery scheduled for less than a week away to remove the plica.

January 30th, 2014- Had my knee scoped to remove the plica. My doctor told me I'd be 100% in 6 weeks and that I wouldn't need PT. He did arthroscopic surgery to remove the plica. He also ended up removing scar tissue from below my kneecap- something that had never bothered me before, but they did it anyone since they were in there. The aching went away for awhile.

February, 2013- The aching was back.

March, 2014 - December 2014- Managed the pain. Had good days and bad days. Was in no way able to run/lift the way I wanted to. I went to my chiro. I rested. I stopped lifting. I stopped doing speed work. I stopped doing double digit runs.

January, 2015- I committed myself to rehabbing my knee and doing exercises and stretches for my hips/glutes in effort to take the load of my IT band and knee. 

February, 2015 - April, 2015- I saw a marked improvement during this time, but then things came to a standstill. And with the hip pain I started to experience in April, my knee went downhill- even though I took a substantial amount of time off of running and decreased my mileage to anywhere from 0-6 miles per week.

May 25. 2015- BREAKDOWN. I finally broke down and cried to Paul. My knee has been a problem for me for almost two years. EVERYTHING bothers it. Even resting bothers it. I can't lift. I can't run hills. I can't do speed work. I can't do long runs. Even WALKING bothers it some days. I lay on the couch and it PULSATES for no freaking reason. It even pulsates under my kneecap. My doctor told me I'd be better in 6 weeks. It's almost a year later and I am struggling even more than I was struggling before my surgery.

I wish I had never gotten surgery.

I wish my knee was better.

I wish I could do all the things I really want to do.

I am really sad.


I made an appointment with the doctor who did my surgery. It is on June 8th. I am pretty sure they will X-ray it right there on the spot and then schedule me for an MRI. Whatever my doctor says, I am going to get a second opinion.

I'm so frustrated, guys. I miss squatting and sprinting and freaking being able to drive without my knee hurting. Even as I sit here at my desk typing, my knee hurts. I didn't even run or walk today.

32 comments:

  1. I am so sorry, Megan. I am sad for you. Coming from someone who has had years of issues with my hips/low back/glutes I can tell you that if this is important to you (and I gather it is) no matter how tiring it may be, you should keep seeking until you find answers. There will be a doctor, PT, etc. out there that can help you! And I am not sure if this will help or not, but I know I felt very out of control when all this started happening so I finally figured out a plan that will (mostly) work for me, and it helped me to feel more empowered. Am I pain free all the time? No, mostly I am. But I do have a weekly workout plan that allows me to get 3-4 days of running in (4-5 miles) and I am OK w/ that. I still get greedy and want to run every day because I do love it but I just have to remind myself the consequences. Keep your chin up and if you want to talk, let me know. Really. I am just a phone call or email or text away :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, Susan. I definitely need a plan, then I will feel empowered. I have made plans for myself, have seen improvements, and then the improvements will stop. It's just so frustrating. And the shit has really hit the fan with the whole walking thing. Walking DEF has helped me improve my hip, but it has really opened my eyes to the fact that my knee is not that great. And I knooooow that is prob what instigated the hip thing. My expectations at this point are not to be able to run 40-50 miles a week. I would really like to run 4 days a week with one of those runs being double digits. 20-30 miles per week would be just fine and dandy to me. But I'd also like to lift lower body 2 times a week as well. I miss that SO much. And I miss Zumba.

      Delete
  2. I had my ACL replaced with my patella tendon a little over 3 years ago. That was scalpel surgery, not arthroscopic, and it took quite a few months to recover. I'm probably 90% of where I was before my ACL tore, and I can live with that.

    I'm surprised that there weren't follow up visits with the surgeon. You need to get in there and figure out what is going on. And with rehab - there are all types of rehab available - some good, some not so good. Do your due diligence and find a great physical therapist that specializes in athletes/knee injuries and recoveries. They are out there.

    Good luck to you - it's just a small blip in your running lifestyle. You will get better. Hang in there...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I had one follow up to get the stitches out... that's it. And I didn't go back searching for answers because I always felt like there was something I was doing wrong, or something more I could do to help the situation. And there have been times where I have seen improvement, but then the improvement would stop. Or as soon as I started ramping up intensity, I'd be back to square one, you know? I'm so frustrated. I totally agree with you about PTs. I have seen some HORRIBLE PTs over the years. I really need to find one that listens to me and searches to find out the problem. I really thank you for your words of encouragement, I appreciate it!

      Delete
  3. Oh no, I am so sorry to hear this. I thought your knee was doing better and the hip was more of a problem lately. I definitely agree that you should get a second opinion, and keep looking for someone who can help you. I just started reading Kelly Starretts new book- Becoming a Supple Leopard. It has some more in depth info than his previous book, but not sure if it would be of any help to you at this point. Hang in there, you will figure something out!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I should grab that book to read this summer. I loved Ready to Run and incorporated some REAL positive stuff into my running from that,

      Delete
  4. I can TOTALLY relate to what you are going through! Your injury time line is much like mine. I'm not sure how young/old you are but I for one am not accepting that my body is just too old for running. I hope you are able to get to the bottom of your pain!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. I am sorry you are going through similar frustrations. I am 32. I'm definitely not accepting that I am too old to run, squat lunge, or even freaking WALK.

      Delete
  5. Oh Meg, I am so sorry :(. I wish I knew what to say or do to make it better for you. I can't imagine the frustration you must be feeling! I'm glad you said that you're seeing a doctor soon and then getting a second opinion, because that was my first thought - if you're in pain all the time see a doctor, a different doctor, because something isn't right and you need some answers.

    Good luck lady! I'll be thinking of you and sending my good vibes!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Hannah. I put off seeing a doctor because I was always thinking of something else I could do to make it better... and it did get better for a little bit, but not 100%. And then I think that instigated the hip problem. My knee needs to be 10)% so the rest of my body is. I'm sooooo hoping I get some answers. Thank you for your kind words.

      Delete
  6. Awww Meg....I am so sorry. I know how much running and exercising means to you. Chronic pain is such a bitch and when it is in a supporting joint then it is a double bitch. I hope you find the magic combination. I know that can be a hard thing to do and you want to trust the "professionals" but they are not always right. Sometimes, they are so wrong that you feel like you went backwards. Chin up girl. I will be sending good karma your way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much for your words of encouragement, Donna. I am sooo skeptical of doctors! I don't know if that is good or bad for me at this point.

      Delete
  7. I am sorry that you are still dealing with the hip/knee issues. I definitely think that it is time to see the doctor and get some answers ( I think the MRI will help to figure things out too).
    Sending positive thoughts...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope the MRI turns up SOMETHING besides "your knee is inflammed".

      Delete
    2. I'll be like, "no shit, sherlock. I could have told you that!

      Delete
  8. Sorry Megan... I guess as runners we almost have to anticipate there will be many times we cannot do what we want due to injuries or have to change our way of thinking and methodology of how we run... I have been on the plantar fasciitis roller coaster for quite some time and now the knee I had surgery on is acting up a little too. I have resigned myself of walking a 1/4 mile out of every mile... is it what I want to do, no, but if it keeps me running every other day, I am okay with that. Try and be patient (that coming from an extremely impatient person)... you have the knowledge to get yourself back to where you want to be. I have kind of given up on modern medicine for my orthopedic as well as general health issues but hopefully you can find one that helps! Get that second opinion no matter what.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't feel like I have the knowledge... well, I thought I did but then everything I try works for a little and then stops. :( I am definitely not a patient person, but 2 years is just ridiculous. I remember back when I felt like a month was a long time to be down and out- HAHAHAHA!

      Delete
  9. So sorry about your injury :( Hope doctor can give you answers on June 8th! I have been out with a bum foot and it is no fun! Simply frustrating! Just when I think it is improving, i have a day when it feels like I am at day1! Trying to stay positive and been doing low impact work outs! But I miss running! I want to ruN!!
    Hang in there and try to stay positive! Praying for good news and recovery soon!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Polly, I can so relate about feeling good and then feeling like you're starting at Day 1! I am sorry we can relate on such a frustrating topic. Hang in there good. I am hoping for recovery for you too!

      Delete
  10. I am so very sorry that things have not been progressing as expected with your knee. There is really nothing worse than being in pain ;( You have been so diligent, patient and smart with your exercise approach, so I can completely understand your frustration and sadness. I am hopeful that you will get some answers at your appointment. Try to keep positive through this, and keep doing what you can until you get some answers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Eugenia. I feel like I gave up on answers from a doctor but I should NOT have. I am glad I made the appt.

      Delete
  11. I am so sorry Megan I really am. I understand the frustration. I went through a very long period, several cortisone shots, etc...of not even being able to lift my left shoulder w/o pain, it was awful.
    I think you need to try a new doctor! There must be something going in in there besides inflammation.
    I hope you can get some answers and a plan to get the pulsing to go away. I wish I had something to offer that would help. I hate, hate, hate, that when you are trying to take care of yourself, your body isn't cooperating, that is frustration I totally get and you have every right to feel upset about.
    (((((Hugs from VA))))))

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm so sorry your knee is giving you such a hard time :( I know it has to be so frustrating and uncomfortable to be constantly in pain. I also know how frustrating it is to have doctors and PTs who don't understand and seem like they don't care. I hope your appointment in June can lead to some answers for you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Courtney! The not caring part is what bothers me. :( So annoying.

      Delete
  13. I'm so sorry Meg-that has to be incredibly frustrating to not have any answers. And I'm sure everyone has their theory about what you should or shouldn't be doing, but no two bodies are alike. :(

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh no, this is a sad post Meg. I wish I could give you a hug. <3 I have had a few breakdowns when I was training for marathons they usually happen at the dinner table with Matthew suddenly and he does not know what is going on! I feel like when we find out that we are not in control of something with our body it becomes very scary and the unknown is even more terrifying. I hate to think that something could stop me from running, especially my own body. Take care and be gentle with yourself. I wish I had some good advice for you but I really am not an expert in the area of knees. Keep us updated!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Heather, I will def keep you posted. Going to the dr. June 8th.

      Delete
  15. I am SO sorry you're having to deal with this and are feeling so discouraged. I can't imagine how frustrating and difficult this must be, and you're usually SO positive about it all. Have you been back to see the doctor who scoped your knee to make sure everything is still okay? Is there another option for you to look into now that might help you improve faster?

    Healing takes times, but I get the frustration of TWO YEARS of waiting to feel better!! I'm sending you major virtual hugs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Ali, I do have an appt. with my surgeon on June 8th. I need answers!

      Delete