A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

Thursday, November 10, 2016

Americans will remember November 9th.

Like most Americans, I woke up Wednesday morning feeling sick, shocked, embarrassed, and saddened beyond belief. It's hard to describe the feeling. But it hovered on my chest and it's still there.

It was a strange day. The sky was dark, rainy, and overcast... which was actually kind of perfect. Did anyone else just feel really weird all day? Maybe I was imagining it, but most people I saw seemed sad. It could have been all in my head.

I had no desire to do anything. I went through the motions at work, then rushed home early due to a plumbing emergency that initially felt like a huge deal. But then I remembered who we had elected president, and the fear mongering rhetoric he spewed toward American minorities. I told myself that an expensive home repair really doesn't matter at all right now.

November 9th will be a day many Americans remember for the rest of our lives. I feel like years from now, I will look back on this day and clearly remember the sadness and uncertainty I felt for our nation. The devastation of knowing that all the progress we made as an inclusive, right giving (not taking away) nation could be repealed on day one of the president elect's term.

When I think back to November 9th, I will remember it as a day of grief and a day of darkness. Many of you are ready to move forward. I'm not. I'm still stuck, looking around, and wondering how we let this happen. 

I'm not ready to laugh about it yet, and I don't know if I ever will be. Not when women's rights are threatened. Not when I fear for our national security and our relationships with foreign allies. Not when I see my Mexican American friends and LGBT friends feeling like half the country is against them. Not when Muslim Americans are afraid to walk down the street in hijab.

I wish things felt normal but they don't. Will they ever feel normal again? I suppose there will be a new normal. I'm afraid to find out what that is.
How did you feel when you woke up November 9th?
Were you able to take care of yourself?
Did you have to have a sad conversation with your children or students?

37 comments:

  1. I will most definitely remember yesterday and how I felt forever. I tried to put it out of my head so I wouldn't seem outwardly upset to students. But then one would remind me and I couldn't help but hang my head a little. Wake me up when November ends!!

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  2. Very sad, very shocked. Talked about it a lot with Rick who is the main person I talk to about politics. Not only am I super upset about Donald Trump being president, but all branches of our government are now majority Republican. Where's the balance?!?

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    1. I don't think there is balance. :( And to think she won the popular vote. Most people did not want this.

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  3. The flippant people at work is the worst. They don't understand or care enough about politics to get how serious this is. They think it's funny. They think it's worth a shrug and laugh. Some of them are genuinely excited and happy about it.

    I am filled with dread and I don't know how anyone can feel otherwise.

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    1. Dread. That's a good way to put it. I had to deal with a flippant comment yesterday and my snark came out. Today I overheard a conversation between two teachers saying they would feel the same no matter the outcome. Seriously. This is the stupidity we're living with.

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  4. I stayed awake, and I will always remember waking up my husband to tell him--and his reaction. I had a difficult talk with my kids, and my youngest (8th grade), was in tears and was actually scared. I told my kids, that we can control our reaction to things, and that it is now up to us rise above this. CRAZY. Because there is so much wrong on such a basic, fundamental level.

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    1. I do not envy parents right now, especially parents of daughters. I am so sad kids are scared. Children at my elementary school are scared.

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  5. I don't know how we can just "move on and see what happens." That complacency is really what got us here in the first place. I have come to recognize that I live in a bubble of people who are well educated about the issues. I literally had no idea that a Trump presidency was possible. I knew the polls were close but I brushed it off. You were much more in tune with what might/did happen.

    Complacency is definitely not the path forward, but for me the first step is really trying to understand how we got here. I don't believe that half of our country is racist. I believe people may be uneducated about the issues. I believe they may not know how to seek out truthful information. They may not understand what was at stake with the supreme court. They may not understand how congress works. They may not even know that things like the marriage equality law can be taken away. I believe many do not feel recovered from the recession and that can make them feel desperate to vote for "change."

    I want to try to understand all the reasons good people felt the need to vote for Trump. (definitely not talking about the racists, misogynists and single issue voters). If we don't try to understand those people, we have no hope of changing their vote next election unless Trump really Fs up the economy. I believe that could happen because economists believe it could happen, but I can't hope for it just so we can elect a democrat in 4 years.

    Also, Megan, I'm just so sad for Hillary. I would never have voted for her just because she's a woman, and I would have been very happy to help elect Bernie, but I tear up every time I see a picture of her now. She has spent so much of her life paving the way for other women, and as such a well qualified presidential candidate it's a shame that she won't be the first woman president.

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    1. I haven't even gotten sad for Hillary yet. I am deep in sad/scared mode for our whole country. I know Hillary is scared for our country too. I don't live in a bubble, I actually live in a very red area and there are a lot of people around here that don't care about facts or how to get them. So then you have actual smart people with misinformation. I'm not blaming them at all. There is no blame because there is blame EVERYWHERE. We all have blame for this outcome. I tried so hard though.

      I hope he doesn't F up the economy. I hope he doesn't start a war. I hope he fails at building his wall, tearing apart families, and taking away rights from women and LGBT. I hope he fails at enacting stop and frisk. Because I think if he fails at those things, that means America's success! Does that make sense?

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  6. I am sorry you had such an awful day.
    I just have a different perspective, it is not that I do not care about this country at all because I am a very patriotic person. I care very much about everyone's right to pursue freedom, I care very much about the fundamentals we are built and very blessed to live where I do. I do always vote, support local candidates, but it is not a huge passion for me. In the end I do not have control and i have to accept what the majority rules...I have to accept the good with the bad because I have lived long enough to know not everyone will ever get everything we want. It still does not change who i am, or how I live my life, and I do not believe people or things are suddenly going to change in huge swings.
    I found the process sad this time as a whole.
    I am sorry you feel so sad.

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    1. You do have control if you choose to act on it. I am a very passionate voter because when other's rights are taken away, that affects ALL of us. Their rights gone first, our rights gone next. I am a woman, but I do have a certain privilege as a white woman. I realize that. That's why I stand up for those who don't have that privilege.

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    2. I get the feeling you don't think you have a say in the things you care about. YOU DO! But you can't just sit back. Use your voice.

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    3. Well said Karen. I agree very much with your statement. I believe things work out in the end.

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    4. I have voted many times to exercise my right to have say, but i have seen many things happen I may consider a "loss" and as a "win" - eventually I stopped viewing things as a loss or a win that is my main point.

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  7. What's crazy is that we will remember 9-11 and yesterday was 11-9.

    I'm very scared and sad. I do respect the office of the president, but I do not have any respect for Trump as a person. Those are two different things. As far as waiting and seeing goes, I wish Trump the best as president. I wouldn't wish failure on anyone and I live in America... but he has no political track record and he can't just un-say everything he has said. The deleted tweets, the statements that miraculously disappeared from his website after the election.

    Still the president is just one person. We may not have the power he has but we can do good. The president does not just make America, Americans make America.

    Also as much as I hate Trump I am more upset that the Republicans took everything because now they are completely in power and will be in power of all 3 branches of government when Trump appointments Supreme Court justices. This thing is a whole lot bigger than just Trump, unfortunately... :(.

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    1. As terrified as I am of Trump, what terrifies me more is of the Rs controlling every branch of government, so there will be no checks on him. Why would they? It is so scary and sickening.

      I do realize the president is one person but he controls so much. You think voter suppression was bad this time around? Just wait.

      I didn't hear anything about tweets or deleted statements from his website. I actually have not turned on the news nor have a listened or read a single word he has said.

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  8. I said this to my friends yesterday, so I'll say it here. Since some were looking at Canada, I said please don't go. Changes are still needed here, and we need to work for change every day. It's not every 4 years. Keep speaking up.

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    1. Yes, no one should go. Unless they actually feel like their life is in danger, then you have to do what you have to do. And we have to accept that they feel so threatened. But no I never threatened to move. I think those of us who want to do good are needed here now more than ever.

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  9. Meg, I'm sorry that you were so upset about this. I hope you get back to feeling normal soon. I honestly had no reaction other than surprise when I heard about the results on Weds. No one at my house was upset, the kids were fine. What I'm most sickened by is the reactions of people out protesting the results. I can't stand to see so much hate going on and the country so divided. We need to support the decision that was made and move on.

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    1. Lisa, can you understand how it is very hard for a lot of people to "move on". I know for some of us who are white/middle class may not be able to put ourselves into the shoes of the minority groups that Trump has marginalizes, blames, and spoke hatefully about throughout his campaign. For over half the country (because over half the country did not vote for him) it is not time to move on. It is time to get down to work. I really like Bernie's statement: “To the degree that Mr. Trump is serious about pursuing policies that improve the lives of working families in this country, I and other progressives are prepared to work with him. To the degree that he pursues racist, sexist, xenophobic and anti-environment policies, we will vigorously oppose him.”

      I did not turn on the news, I heard there were protests. As I have always said, I am a supporter of peaceful protests, whether it's BLM, the Dakota pipeline, whatever. Peaceful protests (whether I agree on what is being protested) is where it's at. I do not condone violence at all for any reason.

      I am glad your kids are fine. I am glad you and your husband are fine. Many Americans are not fine right now. Many Americans have the potential for their basic human rights to be taken away. Who knows what Trump will do and follow through with, but he has promised that.

      None of us should be fine with that or ready to move on. It's time to work.

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    2. To clarify - move on, meaning move forward. Working on goals, yes. Being hateful and spiteful, no. Forgetting about what values and morals we stand for, no. I had several friends who were saying terrible things about people who didn't vote for Hillary. Is that really what it's about? I don't think so and I don't think that should be going on.

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    3. I agree that we shouldn't be saying hateful things to others, it won't help anything. I do think we have to consider why people are saying hateful things. If they are part of a group that Trump marginalized or condemned during his campaign, it would be difficult to contain their raw emotions. If I were Muslim American, lgbtq or any of the groups afraid of my basic rights being taken away I would be upset that someone voted in favor of me being treated like a second class citizen.

      Some people will be hateful just for the sake of it, but I imagine many people are feeling defensive upon learning that their friends/colleagues/family voted against their basic rights.

      I'm not upset that people didn't vote for Hillary, I'm upset that they did vote against equal rights, a tax plan that favors the wealthy, a commitment to clean energy, acknolegement of climate change which is very very very real for those of us who live near the beach and can see the effects of it first hand, etc.

      For those of us interested in politics, it's not as cut and dry as "vote for this guy, don't vote for that guy." We vote based on issues that are important to us and that we feel passionate about. Issues that most definitely affect this country as a whole.

      I hope maybe you can understand why people are protesting and exprsssing raw emotions. They aren't protesting the results of the election but rather the platform on which Trump ran and the plans he has said he will put into place starting on day one.

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  10. You put it all so beautifully! I still can't find coherent thoughts. My sister called me last night, and when she asked me how I was, I lost it and started crying all over again. She said to not be sad for Hillary, and I tried to explain to her that I wasn't sad that Hillary lost, or for Hillary, I was angry and frustrated that hate and racism had won.

    I think that we will not have a normal again for a while, because we will need to be more aware of hatred and be ready to fight it.

    I unfriended people of Facebook who were telling others to move on and get over it. We can't just "get over" the hatred that Trump put out for the last year and a half. We don't just look at today and hope that he is a brand new man, because he is not. I don't need that negativity in my life.

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    1. I completely understand where you are coming from. That's what so troubling about people hoping he is a brand new man... Trump has shown us who he is every step of the way on this campaign. Every step of his life he has shown who he was. It is documented. Why would he change now when he is given even more power? It is so scary I fear for our country and for the world. I really do.

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  11. Meg, I just want to say thank you for standing up to all of the people who are telling everyone to "just accept it and move on!" I know these people mean well, but it's very dismissive, and I wish people could just respect the fact that others are upset and need time to process those feelings. Let's give people the space they need to be upset; those telling everyone to "move on" would want the same courtesy if the roles were reversed.

    I, for one, am glad you are talking about this - frankly, I wish more of us would. People need to wake up and realize this is a big deal. It affects all of our lives, whether we want to accept that reality or not. People not caring and not being willing to talk about issues is how we got here in the first place. You have every right to be upset. I'm not yet ready to laugh (wtf?) yet either, but hey, how nice that so many of us have that kind of privilege.

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    1. It is dismissive. And I don't want anyone to just sit back silently when there is an injustice. That doesn't mean rudeness or violence, that just means continuing to speak up and do the hard work. I really think this horrible outcome is going to make me an even bigger participant in this democracy. I am actively searching for things I can do to make sure that every American has basic human rights.

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  12. I feel weird talking about how sad I am because I'm not even American, but I can't help it. We live 3 miles away from the border. I lived in LA when I was a kid, and a large chunk of my family lives in AZ. I'm thankful to be Canadian, but I am not ignorant; I have no doubt that this will affect us up here. I made a vow that I would not cross the border if that man became president. My nephew, he's 18, has cerebral palsy and he watched that shit for brains mock a disabled reporter. Most 18 year-olds don't even do stupid shit like that. Anyway, yeah. I'm sad and yes, I have been crying off and on for two days now. My nephew has been posting quotes and verses about forgiveness and grace, so he is definitely better than I am.

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    1. It is a sad situation not just for our country, but for the world. We are indeed being laughed at right now. Please remind your Canadian friends that Trump does represent a portion of America- the racist, misogynist, xenophobic part (which I'm sure exists in Canada too)... he does not represent all of us. More Americans did not vote for this monster and we are sickened and disgusted. Remind people that. We are in a sad situation down here.

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  13. So I'm a white male, age 55, and I voted for Hillary. I have a personal issue with Trump. The year I ran the Atlantic City marathon, I had a reservation at his hotel. The hotel went bankrupt, and I lost the deposit. Vendetta.

    According to my demographics, Trump's election is my fault. But don't blame me...

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    1. Sorry you had that experience at his hotel. :( According to the demographics, more white women and white men voted for Trump than Hillary. (white woman here and of course I didn't vote for Trump!) I have not played the blame game yet because when I think about who or WHAT is at fault for this monster being the leader of the free world... I feel like there are a lot of things to blame. Too many to count!

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  14. It's truly awful! I'm trying to put my anger to good use though to really DO SOMETHING to change the world for the better!

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    1. I am not ready to do something, but I will be. I am still just kind of in a horrible daze.

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  15. I haven't slept, I haven't eaten and I have this big ugly pit sitting in my stomach and I am afraid it's not going to go away for a long time. This election should never have happened.
    This is not like "any old election".... most Republican candidates would have been a nuisance to the liberals, but this man is a threat to everything (I thought) this country stands for.

    If refuse to accept explanations why otherwise reasonable, kind people voted for him. You (generic) might not be a racisct, misogynist or bigot, but by voting for Trump, you endorsed it.

    I really don't care what someone's platform is (and this man actually stands for just about anything that seems "useful" at the moment), if that platform is built and promoted on hate, marginalization and finger-pointing.

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    1. It's such a horrible feeling. I hate that we all feel this way. We are just soaking this in, but I know soon we will be ready to fight and do the work that needs to be done. I hate this San, I really do.

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  16. harrowing read from the new yorker:

    http://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/an-american-tragedy-donald-trump



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    1. Thanks for sharing that. This is ur worst nightmare.

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