At the end of the post, I promised you there was more drama to discuss but I was saving it for today. I had to gather my thoughts before I posted and I'm glad I did. LET'S DIG IN.
Drama #1: I have prehypertension!
I was pretty worked up when I went to the doctor and I warned the medical assistant about that. My blood pressure was 136/74.
I had always heard 120/80 was ideal, but since the assistant nor the doctor mentioned anything about it to me, I just chalked it up to the fact that it was a little high due to being nervous about dying.
But within my discharge papers, they gave me a printout on how to lower your blood pressure because I have ADULT PREHYPERTENSION.
pre·hy·per·ten·sion
ˌprēˌhīpərˈtenSHən/
noun
- the condition of having blood pressure between 120/80 mmHg and 139/89 mmHg, considered an indication of risk for hypertension.
The printout gave me tips on how to lower my blood pressure.
- Exercise 30-45 minutes a day- check!
- Lose weight if needed- N/A
- Eat a diet full of veggies- check!
- Get enough sleep- check!
- Lower sodium intake- GUILTY!
- Drink less alcohol- I could cut back.
But I was convinced the reason my blood pressure was so high was due to being nervous. But then I read an article that said even if your blood pressure is high in stressful situations, it's still not good that your body responds that way.
So I have decided to stop adding salt to my food. I normally add salt to pretty much EVERYTHING. I salt my Chinese food for goodness sake. I LOVE salt. But I should probably try to tame that love. I know the body needs salt and I know athletes need salt. But should I really be adding it to everything? Probably not.
The next day, I talked it over with my school nurse and she took my blood pressure. It was lower- 126/78. That's good. I'm going to monitor it. And stop adding salt to every single thing I put in my mouth.
Drama #2: I accidentally saw how much I weigh!
I suffered for years with being obsessed with food, exercise, calories, weight, body image... the whole works. I feel like I only get weird about that kind of stuff 5% of the time, which is a huge step in a positive direction.
One thing I never do anymore is weigh myself. My weight can ruin my day. It can make me feel like a piece of crap. I know that is not healthy. I know how much I weigh should NOT define my day or kill my mood, but it does. So my solution to that is that I never weigh myself. I determined that as long as my clothes fit, there is no reason to worry.
Over the past three years, the only clothes I have grown out of are certain shirts and dresses that are tight on top. (No, my boobs didn't grow, but my back and shoulders got bigger due to lifting.) But all my pants, shorts, and skirts fit, so I just figure all is good in the hood. Sometimes I feel a little down about how I look, but I think that is normal.
I never look at my weight when I go to the doctor. In fact, I make it a point to ask them not to tell me how much I weigh. But stupid me looked at my discharge paper and there it was, my height and weight in all it's glory.
I weigh 4lbs more than I want to. This RUINED my day. This convinced me I needed to go on a diet. I was crushed. My clothes were fitting, why did I weigh so much? Maybe I could have gained 1-2lbs of muscle at the most, but probably not more than that! How much did my clothes weigh? A pound? THESE ARE THE UNHEALTHY, CRAZY THOUGHTS THAT GO THROUGH MY BRAIN!!!!
I was really depressed about it.
I haven't counted calories in so long and pretty much eat what I want- which is mainly healthy foods but of course I eat dessert, put buffalo pretzels on my salad, go out to eat once in awhile, etc. So I am not HARDCORE about it. I have... moderation?
I knew what I had to do. I had to go home and try on a couple pairs of jean shorts I hadn't worn since last summer. If my shorts fit, then all is good, right?
The shorts fit. Whew.
But I was still alarmed by the NUMBER.
I KNOW I SHOULD NOT BE ALARMED BY THE NUMBER. I'm the first person to tell you your weight doesn't tell you how fast you can run a mile, how many pull ups you can do, how much muscle you have, etc, etc, etc... I could go on and on forever. LOGICALLY I KNOW THAT THE NUMBER BARELY TELLS ME ANYTHING.
But I still care. And I am ashamed about that.
I started tracking my calories on My Fitness Pal just to see what's going on. How much am I actually eating? What are my macros? Am I drinking enough water? I'm just interested in seeing what's going on. More on that soon...
If you know a lot about blood pressure, school me please! I'm sure I don't know what I'm talking about...
Do you weigh yourself?
Im sorry that you saw the number and it upset you! I don't weigh myself, but I do see my weight when i got to the doctor. It fluctuates so much that I am usually ok about it. However, last year I went for my physical and my weight was like 5 pounds more than the year before. But it was right before my period was due so I knew that was part of the reason, plus the year before I had been marathon training. But my dr. told me to watch my weight! I was still in a healthy weight range so this annoyed me.
ReplyDeleteI've always had good blood pressure (its usually exactly 120/80) but I hardly eat any salt. Im sure I could be told to drink less alcohol though!
Wow I am surprised your doctor told you to watch your weight! That would have pissed me off SO MUCH as you clearly were in a healthy weight range, and like you said, it can fluctuate. Stellar marks for your blood pressure! Are you a calm person by nature or are you high strung? You seem calm from your blog. :)
DeleteIm actually pretty high strung so I am always surprised that its in the normal range. Usually when I get it checked Ive had coffee and am nervous so I wonder if its really actually lower than that? I was actually thinking about asking my doctor about it because sometimes I get kind of light headed, and I don't know if thats connected.
DeleteHmmm that's so interesting that your doctor said the body shouldn't respond to stressful situations with elevated blood pressure. I thought that was a normal reaction!! Back when I had my ED and was at my skinniest I was diagnosed with prehypertension as well, but I think it had to do with stress. I was always suuuuuper stressed out seeing the doctor and just always super anxious in general. Now at my heaviest weight ever I do not have prehypertension, go figure. I would guess exercise and just generally being less stressed out has something to do with it. Stress wrecks havoc on the body!!
ReplyDeleteI know you know this already, but 4lbs could be normal weight fluctuation. I don't think you should weigh yourself again any time soon if it causes issues, but you could totally weigh yourself in a couple days and that 4lbs could be gone without making any changes to your diet/exercise routine.
My doctor didn't tell me that, I read it in an article that was basically saying, yes, your blood pressure can go up due to being nervous about it (white coat syndrome) but that it's still not a good thing. But it was just one article.
DeleteStress sure does wreak havoc! I feel like I *am* a high strung person, but most of the time it is sort of a positive high strung/high energy type thing. Like I teach all day long, and I have to be ON and HAPPY and ENERGETIC, or at least pretend to be. I think my thing is when I am stressed I am REALLY stressed until it is over. (Whether "over" is 5 minutes or an hours, whatever.) Like I was really stressed at the doctor but then we went home and just spent time together because we were feeling down and I chilled out.
I do not plan on weighing myself. No good things come of it.
:(
I hear ya, I think I am the same way. When I am stressed I am super stressed. There is no "kinda stressed" level!
DeleteI was the same way about weighing for years but after lots of therapy as of this year I can weigh myself and not freak out. It's a freeing feeling although I rarely see any real benefit to it. The only time I do it is with my dietitian. Surprisingly all of my blood pressure, cholesterol, sugar levels etc were normal when we started working together so weight loss is one key indicator that I'm making progress. I can still freak out sometimes though. Like when I was sick I was really barely eating anything but I gained 3lbs during that two week period and my dietician was like "it's totally normal and 3lbs is nothing in the grand scheme of things" but it was frustrating.
I think weighing became easier for me to do when I started thinking about weight in ranges rather than a single number. Without accounting for normal fluctuations we can drive ourselves crazy as clearly evidenced in this post and by the millions of people who feel the same feelings you did. I mean we have pace ranges for running. We need to give ourself a range for normal weight too!
Yes, I agree a "range" is more realistic. Who knows, maybe this is how much I have always weighed at 5pm in the afternoon?
DeleteOur doctor always takes our blood pressure after her nurse does. Once she is in there and we start being chatty she does it again and it's ALWAYS lower. I am not sure about salt and hypertension. I have low blood pressure and low blood sodium so I have been advised to salt my food. You know my thoughts on weight. If you are the same size, what does it matter? And 4 pounds is how much you can "gain" in a day (say you weigh yourself when you get up and again by the time you go to bed)....food, water, poop...it all adds up and it's all inside us. I think you are doing your body more harm stressing and potentially increasing your blood pressure than just chalking it up to normal fluctuations. As you know right now I am not running and whenever I don't run my weight goes down. I don't quite know why (I am still doing my other sports) but I would imagine it has more to do with water being stored in my muscles. Regardless, I would take those pounds back in a minute if I could be running right now.
ReplyDeleteYeah some people were telling me that most doctors do it a couple times, especially if it is high at first... but every time I go to the doctor, gyno, whatever, the only time I get my blood pressure taken is right after they call my name. The medical assistant takes me right to the scale for measure/height, and then BOOM sit down and take blood pressure.
DeleteHow did you find out you had low blood sodium? I wish I had a medical excuse to add salt to my food! :)
"I think you are doing your body more harm stressing and potentially increasing your blood pressure than just chalking it up to normal fluctuations." <---- I agree with this. Somehow I have to get my messed up brain to back away from the cliff...
Yes, I told you the other day to back away from the ledge--the stress of 4 pounds (whether real or not) simply not worth it at all...I promise! My doctor does a complete blood work up on me each year. My sodium always comes in low -- not dangerously but enough to flag it. So, I salt most of my meals but not all. I actually had to get used to it at first because I didn't love the taste.
DeleteDoes hypertension run in your family? Some people are more inclined to have high BP no matter what they do. I really do think stress made it elevate and I can't see how that wouldn't be a normal thing to do. Sorry the scale upset you. I weigh myself in spurts. If I don't 15 pound will creep on and I'll be very unhappy. I wouldn't sweat 4 pounds though. Not with the way you lift.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if hypertension runs in my family. I will have to ask my mom and dad. I do realize with lifting like I do I'm never going to weigh what I weighed before I lifted. It's funny, I weigh more now than before I started lifting but I wore a bigger size in clothes!
DeleteI would like to lose a few pounds in the belly area before swim suit season and my husband needs to lose weight too. I considered buying a scale this week to start keeping track. I 've never owned a scale before. I debated on perhaps not getting a scale and just using a tape measure to keep track of my inches instead. I really don't care what the # on the scale says but I do care about how my gut looks...lol. Not sure which method would be healthier for me mentally..lol
ReplyDeleteHmmm well if you don't care about the number, maybe do both but not like every day or anything! Just maybe do both at first to get a baseline, then do whatever you plan to do to tone up your belly, and then weigh/measure again and see what's going on?
DeleteMegan,
ReplyDeleteyou are beautiful, smart, strong and compassionate. The number on that scale means NOTHING! It doesn't make you, it's only the amount of pressure gravity is putting on you, nothing more. If you are feeling well, and everything fits, there is nothing to worry about.
Thank you Ana! The non crazy part of my brain is nodding along with you! :)
DeleteI have pre-hypertension as well and monitor it fairly often. It runs in my family. And I eat a pretty healthy diet and exercise is no problem. For me it's worry and stress, so stress-reduction techniques are really a part of my life now. I know you worry too! :) As far as the weight, I wish I could say don't worry about it, but it's such a personal thing. For me personally, I'd rather have my clothes fit and the number be higher than the opposite. To me that's a sign that I need to take action, and unfortunately where I'm currently at. I hope you don't worry too much about it though!
ReplyDeleteI do worry, and I seem to go from zero to BOOM. Summer is coming... maybe I will worry less in the summer? But I do have to fly for two trips so probably not haha.
DeleteMeghan, I can weigh 125lb in the morning after my pee and poo with no clothes on, and then 130lb in the afternoon with leggings and a tee-shirt. A 4lb difference is literally the difference between morning and afternoon with clothes on. I'm not one to blow smoke up your ass, so I'm telling you the truth.
ReplyDeleteBelieve me, I know you don't blow smoke AND the non crazy part of my brain believes you!
DeleteIf it's just up a few pounds and your clothes still fit, I wouldn't worry so much. Maybe you just need to go to the bathroom or you were well hydrated? Also different scales vary, the scale at my house varies from the scale at the gym, etc. I think if your clothes start feeling tighter, it's worth worrying about (unless of course you want them to because you are lifting and growing muscles). I try not to analyze every little pound but it is hard and I'm short so even a few pounds shows.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't worry about the pre-hypertension either. If your blood pressure runs a little high every time you check it, maybe. Plus you were having an overall stressful weekend with not only your own health but also Paul's. Might be a good idea to frequent the booths at the grocery store for awhile and just keep an eye on it though!
I know logically I shouldn't worry about a couple pounds, due to pretty much everything you mentioned. That's why I am mad at myself for getting wrapped up in it.
DeleteOur school nurse is going to take my bp from time to time to see what's up. She took it yesterday and it was only 126/74 right after teaching a class, so that's not bad!
Ditto on Suzy's comment - I used to weigh myself more because it was fun coming home after a long run (especially in the summer!) and see myself 3 pounds lighter! I haven't weighed myself much lately because I know I'm not running much, and my weight would be higher. It can fluctuate 4 pounds in just a few days for me. Until I have a problem fitting into my current size clothes, I'm not going to stress it. I hope you don't either! (because you look pretty darn fit and strong to me!)
ReplyDeleteThe logical part of me agrees, 4lbs is nothing to get upset over especially if clothes still fit the same!
DeleteYou salt your Chinese food?! I think Chinese is TOO salty because of all the soy sauce lol!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry seeing your weight stressed you out so much. Just drinking 2 glasses of water can add a pound. Depending on what time of day you were weighed, the calibration on the scale, what time of the month it is, etc, you know the scale can easily fluctuate those 4 lbs and it means nothing. It sounds like you're really upset about the number but ALSO upset that the number is upsetting you...Do you think 4 lbs is worth tracking your food and maybe getting yourself back into the habit of obsessing over what you're eating? Clothes really are the best indicator, and it sounds like everything still fits you perfectly!
Yes, I seriously salt my chinese food! Lo mein, General Tsos, and egg rolls! :) I do not put soy sauce on it though.
DeleteYes, I am upset about the number but also mad that I am upset about it. It's a very vain thing to be worried about I think, especially since I'm not overweight. I picture people rolling their eyes at me. I'd roll my eyes too. But I can't help how I feel.
I don't know if the 4lbs is worth worrying about. Probably not.
The 4 pounds could be from the lifting too. I went up 4 pounds too from my annual physical in 2015 and 2016, and I was focusing so much on strength training. I was upping my protein to make sure my muscles had enough support for the training.
ReplyDeleteI know I did gain some muscle in my upper body since last summer, but I would be impressed with myself if I gained 4 lbs! :)
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