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Wednesday, November 7, 2018

I'm A Questioner. (4 Tendencies)

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger... A few months ago, my friend Cat recommended the podcast Happier with Gretchen Rubin. The podcast clicked with me right away. I love Gretchen and Liz's Happiness Hacks, Try This At Home tips, and their discussions on The Four Tendencies.

What is the Four Tendencies? It is a framework that describes how we each respond to outer and inner expectations. Here is a description of each tendency straight from Gretchen's website:

Upholder: “I do what others expect of me—and what I expect from myself.”
Questioner: “I do what I think is best, according to my judgment. If it doesn’t make sense, I won’t do it.”
Obliger: “I do what I have to do. I don’t want to let others down, but I may let myself down.”
Rebel: “I do what I want, in my own way. If you try to make me do something—even if I try to make myself do something—I’m less likely to do it.”


The other night (when I couldn't fall asleep!) I finally decided to take the Four Tendencies Quiz to find out if I was an Upholder, Obliger, Questioner, or Rebel. My result came loud and clear. I am a Questioner. And after reading the description of a Questioner, I wholeheartedly believe the quiz got it right!

Here are some characteristics of Questioners:

  • Questioners only respond to expectations that make sense. Expectations must be inner expectations.
  • Questioners resist anything that lacks purpose.
  • Questioners are motivated by reason and fairness.
  • Questioners tend to be intellectually engaged and will do research.
  • Questioners tend to only take direction from people they respect.
  • Questioners dislike being questioned themselves. They feel they consider their decisions carefully and don't want to justify them.
  • Questioners will stick to a new habit if they find it useful.
Now go take the Four Tendencies Quiz (it takes like 5 minutes) and let me know what you are in the comments!

16 comments:

  1. It sounds like I would be a questioner too. I guess I should take the quiz and find out!

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  2. Megan - I took the quiz and I am a questioner as well. Really, it describes me very well.
    on another note, awesome news on the election, huh? finally, some good news. I like to think we are going in the right direction again. Kristen

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    1. Yes I am very pleased! PA reelected Dem. Gov. Tom Wolf so that is good. He will protect healthcare and women. And then of course we have the house! Yay! It was a stressful night. I forget what state you live in.

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    2. New Jersey - the Dems in my district won, thank goodness! They will protect women/healthcare and fight against #45. Both my husband and I are originally from PA, so we are happy that Wolf won again.

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    3. Yay congrats to Jersey! I have and aunt and uncle in Delran.

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  3. I took the quiz and got obliger which annoys me. I guess I wish I wasn’t an obliger but the description definitely fits.

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    1. Well it just means you meet outer expectations. That's GOOD!

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  4. Mine said Upholder! The description said "They wake up and think: “What’s on the schedule and the to-do list for today?” YEP!!!

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  5. I will need to take the quiz but my gut tells me I am a combo of upholder & questioner.

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  6. I'm somewhere between questioner and rebel. I want to be a questioner, but too often I get frustrated at myself for not even doing the things that I know is good for me!

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    1. My mom thinks I am sometimes a rebel. :) I wonder if questioners are apt to sometimes be rebels as well!? I feel like questioners are controlling and so are rebels so they could crossover?

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  7. I tried to do this quiz and couldn't get through it. It felt so repetitive and none of the answers applied to me at all! Maybe that means I'm a mix of all of them. Like, sometimes I can stick to a habit because I just want to, and sometimes I need accountability. Sometimes I do things people expect because that's how life works, but often I do things my way or resist if I don't like an expectation that's been set. I'm an enigma haha!

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