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Thursday, May 11, 2017

I miss you guys!

It's sort of weird that even though I blog every day, sometimes I start to feel disconnected from you guys. So this is going to just be one of those flowy, get things off my chest, free form type of blog posts.

I'm not going to lie, life has been stressful lately. It's First World Problem stress, but stress nonetheless. I've been really tired, all my body's aches and pains are freaking me out, and work is just TOO MUCH right now.

I know, I know, summer will be here soon. I am seriously normally not this stressed in May! May is normally easy breezy!

It's definitely ME. It's not MAY. It's not WORK. It's how I'm REACTING to everything.

Yesterday was... challenging... on SO MANY LEVELS. But after something particularly challenging happened at work yesterday, my chest had broken out into a freaking rash!

A RASH!!!!

I am breaking out in rashes due to stress. This is NOT NORMAL. Paul went through 2 brain surgeries and I have taken care of him in many ER rooms and never have I broken out into a RASH due to that stress. This just PROVES that it is not the actual situation, but how I am reacting/able to cope with things is just really off lately.

Hopefully I will be able to deal with "life" in a normal way soon. 

Until then, hopefully no rashes today!
Do you ever find yourself not being able to deal with things you normally are able to take in stride?

How do you center yourself and get you back into a healthy mindset?

Did you ever break out in a rash????

21 comments:

  1. Sorry you have been so stressed lately! I feel like sometimes I get all worked up and when I try to figure out why it doesn't really make sense. Hopefully once the school year is over you can take the time you need to really relax!

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    1. Not knowing why you are worked up must be frustrating! I feel like I know what is stressing me, it's just surprising to me that I can't handle it in stride like normal.

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  2. I am so sorry you are going through this. Do you think all the stress is just work related or is something else contributing to it as well? Feel free to text or call anytime!

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    1. Thank you my friend! The stress always manifests itself at work and is triggered by work stuff, so I assume that is what it is. But then this past weekend I was kind of feeling down in the dumps. Let's see what this weekend brings...

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  3. I'm sorry to hear this!! Do you think it's work, or other things in the world these days? Absolutely - stress gets to everyone, you are not alone. I have never gotten a rash. Typically the amount of things on my "to do" list cause the most stress in my life. The thing that really helps me is making lists. I'm all about the lists and when I get things written down, I can clear them from my head. It helps me tremendously. Not sure if you can do this for your stress related items, but often times just writing them down makes me do a reality check on what really needs to be done, and what I can put off (for now, or forever!). Hope that helps you some :)

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    1. I think it is work. It always manifests and gets triggered by work stuff. There are things I am worried about for our country but I am trying really hard to keep those fears in check and simply just do what *I* can so I feel like I am taking control a little bit, if that makes sense? But all this stuff that came crashing down these past two weeks... I really think it is work.

      I LOVE LISTS!!! We are so alike. Lists do make me feel in control. And these are pen and paper lists, not lists on my phone. I suspect you are a pen and paper gal too. :)

      Some things are stressful that can't be remedied with a list though. That's the problem. I wish I could be more detailed but you can imagine work related stuff that pops up or people's attitudes, kid behavior, all that stuff that you can't plan for.

      I really appreciate your comment, Lisa. :)

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  4. I hope things get better soon *hugs*. At least with the school/work issues, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel when school ends in a few weeks, but I know it is still hard. Plus, you have the health issues to deal with on top of it. Give yourself some grace and if you ever need someone to listen, I'm on Facebook messenger all the time ;).

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    1. Thanks girl. I do see the light at the end of the tunnel but for some reason it's not helping this year! I have never felt this way at the end of the school year. May is usually sooooo easy breezy. Waking up at 4:30 for PT and then driving like a maniac to get to work on time isn't a good start to the day either haha.

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  5. I am sorry that you broke out in a rash. I break out in hives when I'm super mad so I know it can be such a frustrating response to an emotion.

    I tend to overreact to things most when there are a million little things coming at me at once. Like I can deal with ONE of these stressors, but I can't cope with ALL of these stressors, you know what I mean? It's especially bad if I'm not getting good sleep and I'm eating poorly on top of the other stressors ... which is usually the case.

    Breathe, think of the cats kneading their blankets, and remind yourself that the school year is almost over!

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    1. I am amazed at how many people get rashes/hives from stress and anger. I didn't realize this. If you don't mind sharing, what made you so angry that you got hives???

      When I read your comment about the cats kneading their blankets, I smiled so hard. :) When Paul gets MRIs, it stresses him out and I told him to picture Jelly and Christmas in a field chasing butterflies. :)

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  6. Ah yes, the fascinating way stress manifests itself in our bodies can be such a pain sometimes but a lifesaver too, because then we can't keep pushing through it, ignoring the fact that there's a shit tonne of it. I get guttate psoriasis when I get super stressed. I also get twitching. It's not muscular, like the kind you get from running a marathon but it's neurological where a body part (my eye, my lip, my arm, hand, leg, foot, whatever) will just randomly fling out or twitch. My "favourite" stress sign is a rapidly beating heart. Trachycardia or something like that. It'll kinda skip a beat and then WHAM WHAM WHAM beat really hard through my chest to the point where it makes me cough. I've been checked out for it and my heart it healthy and everything. It's "just" stress. So, yeah I mean, when these things happen, the one thing that helps me is talking it out with people. Either a therapist or my sisters or close friends. I have a HUGE cry, and just get it out as much as I can that way.

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    1. I've had weird lip and eyelid twitching, but not stress related. Just random for a few seconds. That would be scary if it happened for a REASON. And the heartbeat thing would scare me a lot. I sometimes have friends I can talk to but not always. I am so busy right now and Paul has been gone this whole week. (He just got home so all your murderers out there can just go home.) Stress doesn't make me want to cry. Well, these past two weeks I didn't feel like crying. I felt like screaming and just giving up though!

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  7. I think what makes your situation so hard is that so much of it is out of your control. Kids, parents, other "professionals" in your school. I know you, like me, really like to take a hold of situations and find a solution that is both grounding and makes forward progress. All I can say is there is an end in sight and keep telling yourself "not my monkeys, not my circus". Summer is going to be so rewarding my friend...you have earned it.

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    1. Susan, you hit the nail on the head with the "control" thing. I am sure that has a lot to do with it. "Not my monkeys, not my circus" lol. I love that. I shall play that in my brain.

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  8. I always freak out when something small adds on to everything I'm juggling. I actually have a friend who was so stressed, she broke out with the shingles.

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    1. I didn't realize how common it is for the rash/shingles/have things to happen but judging by these comments it happens a lot. That is crazy.

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  9. I am so sorry you are going through this stress right now. May has NOT been easy at my school either...

    When I was in high school, I had a 'stress event' that lead to me having chronic hives for 6 months. It was horrible having to work through everything myself (I should have been in counseling) on top of the embarrassment of the hives (they were all over my body, face, eyelids). It was awful. Then in college, I got shingles from stress.

    You should definitely take a mental health day, or two days, if you can. I know for me, prepping for a sub is more work than being at school, but really, if you are having a rash, you should take a day off, and see if you can go to the doctor and get anything for anxiety.

    It sucks, I'm here with you.

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    1. Wow A, I am so sorry that something so bad happened to you that you had hives for 6 months. :( That makes me hurt. And shingles? Wow. We have so much to talk about. I miss you. I can't take a mental health day. I have a college student observing me for 8 days as part of her junior practicum. LOL.

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  10. Aw Karen you know that is exactly what my mom told me, focus on one day at a time! :) Thank you for the support.

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  11. I wonder what is going on that's making normal stress situations affect you so much more strongly than usual. Whatever's going on, I hope you are able to rest and find some easement this weekend.

    I have been weirdly annoyed with everyone lately, even people I LOVE and want to spend time with. I think it's just that time of year when I want some alone time but it's hard to come by right now.

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    1. I'm not sure why it is! I wish I knew.

      Oh when I am needing alone time people annoy me too. It's cool you recognize the reason!

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