Full Disclosure: I asked Suzy to come up with a title for this blog post and she suggested "Bus Slop". Unfortunately, I wanted something MEANER!!!!!!! I came up with something really mean, but it would probably make my mom uncomfortable, so I compromised with the title I have now. But I feel bad because now I can probably never ask Suzy for help with a blog post title again because I didn't use her wonderful suggestion. Sorry, Suzy! :( I am not worthy.
My run on Wednesday morning was nearly perfect! It was 54 degrees, so I wore shorts and a short sleeve. The fact that I wasn’t wearing three layers of clothing made me feel lithe and fast, but overall I just had more pep in my step than I have had in a couple weeks.
Lately
I have been venturing over to a large business park for my morning runs. After
8+ years, I am finally bored running loop dee doops around my neighborhood! I
normally only go over to the business park for longer weekend runs, so running
there on a weekday morning magically puts me in a better mood because I associate
that route with the WEEKEND. Isn’t that weird?
I’ve
been dealing with a little bit of a PIMA for a couple days that hasn’t been
getting worse but hasn’t really been getting better either. On this run, it was
relatively quiet so that put me in a good mood too! (PIMAs always confuse me…
part of me doesn’t want to stretch/roll it and “mess” with it but then part of
me thinks I should. I still can’t figure out what works for my body yet in
regards to PIMAs because when I get them, they pop up totally out of the blue and seem to disappear out of the blue too.
I have not been able to decipher the rhyme or reason yet, but I’m working on
it!)
All
this blabbering is basically just setting up for you the fact that I had a very
enjoyable run…
…
until mile 5.94. I was just about to complete my 6 miles and walk the last block
or so back to my house when I ran past a bus stop. It was still early, so there
were only two teenagers waiting there- a couple of boys. Just as I passed by
them, one of the boys screamed “AH!!!!” at me, as loud as he possibly could.
It
startled me but I wasn’t scared. I turned around and stared down the boy who
screamed. “Why would you do that?” I demanded in what was surely my teacher
voice.
The
shitty little teenager looked dumbstruck. “Do what?” he asked. He had the same
look on his face my first graders have when they are lying so they don’t get in
trouble.
It
took me about three seconds to decide what to say. I could just turn and run
away. I could go up to him and introduce myself so he could begin to understand
that he is yelling at a PERSON and not an OBJECT. But then I decided, no, he
doesn’t get to meet me. He doesn’t deserve to meet me. So I said exactly what I really, really wanted to say.
“Grow
the FUCK UP!” I shouted at him. Then I turned around and finished my run.
I
was so angry that I wanted to keep running, but I made myself stop.
I
truly want to know why *some* men/boys think it’s okay to harass women?
What would have you done?
Do men/boys ever harass you when you run?
Do men/boys ever harass you when you run?
I don't understand what it was that he was yelling at you? Was he insinuating that you were scaring him?
ReplyDeleteI had someone in a car honk obnoxiously at me yesterday as I ran across the bridge. My first instinct was to wave because perhaps I knew them, but when I looked up, it wasn't a car I recognized. Also, it was a car that I assumed would belong to the "younger crowd", so maybe they were just being jerks?
He just screamed "Ahhh!" as loud as he could so that he could scare me. It startled me for sure but I wasn't scared for my safety.
DeleteMy first instinct when I get beeps is wondering if I know the person too! But inevitably, no.
Maybe it's not the "right" thing to do but I love that you stopped and confronted that a'hole. I get honked at on a fairly regular basis. Still. At age 54 it's like they're honking at grandma. It's always from a pickup truck. Am I profiling?
ReplyDeleteBeeps always scare me! I wonder, hmmm do they know me? Are they beeping at me to get off the road? Are they just trying to scare me? I don't automatically assume it's like a cat call type of beep because I have gotten beeped at wearing 3 layers and bundled up so much that you prob can't even tell if I'm male or female!
DeleteGross. I once had a carful of teenaged boys cat call me while I was waiting at a traffic light. They got the finger while I wondered if they realized I was twice their age.
ReplyDeleteYeah it's gross isn't it! We're at the age when we're twice the age of idiot teenagers and could be their mothers!
DeleteI don't really get harassed when I run, but I rarely run alone unless I'm on the treadmill. A lot of my runs that are around people in town are with guys, usually older men and probably any harasser would think my training partner is my dad due to age.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry about these rude kids though... most of the kids in my neighborhood are nice thankfully. I like Suzy's proposed title for this too.
Suzy is so good at blog titles. :) Before yesterday, I never had any problems with neighborhood kids. Most of them play outside and are very nice and respectful. There are lots of boys on my street I have run by a million times and they never said something rude to me because, well, they were raised correctly!
DeleteHa ha ha ha! I love your title. I was actually thinking about that whole idea too of walking up to them and introducing yourself so they'd know you're a person. I was brainstorming about what you could say or what you could ask them. But... then you're giving undeserving people way too much energy.
ReplyDeleteRIGHT, and I didn't want him to think that all people who screams at are going to be nice and go up and introduce themselves. He was a little punk, at least 16, and I figured if he was punk enough to scream at me to scare me, then he is punk enough to hear the F-bomb!
DeleteI got cat-called once, from a pickup, which thankfully kept driving. I'm sure I would've said the same thing you did. You don't mess with me at all. I'm part Texan so who only knows what I might do.
ReplyDeleteOh dang girl! Texans sound fiesty. :)
DeleteJust a jerk...I would have been pissed. No one is really up except commuters when I am running. They are a pretty calm group and I don't really get yelled at, thankfully!
ReplyDeleteMaybe I need to start getting up *really* early like you when all the punks are still in bed. :)
DeleteI'm glad you didn't brush it off as boys will be boys because these kids need to understand it's not okay to try and scare someone or to randomly yell at someone. A+ for your response!
ReplyDeleteI've "only" been yelled at twice. Once by a homeless man who thought it was okay to objectify my body and once by the drunk guy who told me I was slow but steady lol. Since I run in a public, crowded area with lots of families around I think people generally behave well!
I remember you telling me about both of those incidents! Now I don't think I would have yelled at just anyone. I felt safe where I was. If I didn't feel safe I would have kept running.
DeleteKids/teenagers do the oddest things that they think are funny. I might have felt a little a little threatened if they did that to me, but I would have let it go. I have never been harassed when running, thankfully. Good for you for standing up to them!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I wasn't afraid of them, but the scream startled me. After that it was allll anger.
Deletehow rude!! was this a teen? how fucking rude!
ReplyDeleteI would have flipped him off and keep on running... I have a nasty habit of flipping off people when I run.
As the mother of a little boy, I am raising him to not treat women as less than him, and to always treat them with respect... you should hear our conversations whenever he says somebody screams like a girl....
Yes, it was a teen. He was at least in HS because it was a HS bus stop. My best guess is that he was 15-16 years old.
DeleteI'm not sure if I ever flipped anyone off while running.
That is good you are raising your son to know women are STRONG.
I had two different dudes sitting in the passenger seat yell out the window as they passed during my 112 miler. I was going 17-20mph with full aero helmet on so I don't know what they yelled. Tyler
ReplyDeleteActually they were probably yelling "Killer helmet dude!"
Deletelol! Or, "GET OFF THE ROAD!" Thanks for the laugh! :)
DeleteFirst of all, I love that running that route during the week tricks your brain into being a good, weekendy mood. Brains are weird!
ReplyDeleteSo, I'm interested to know how old you'd guess this teenager is. Are we talking 14 or 17? I ask because as a MS teacher, I think there's a big difference in how and why teens act this way. Younger teens don't have fully developed brains yet (this is for real lol) so they take risks and act on whims without thinking. When you call out a younger teen for being a total dick, they get defensive because 1) suddenly they realize they did something dumb, and 2) they don't understand why that dumb thing warrants such a strong response.
This is just to say that if an OLDER teen shouted at you, then they are an asshole. If it was a younger teen, they are just a moron. Probably.
Either way, it's not okay. And I know in the past you schooled some kids who shouted at you, but it's not your job or duty to take your time to teach them how to be good human beings when you're just out for your run. I do think, though, that that kid will think next time he sees a runner, and probably won't yell again. He may have had a shit-eating grin or later laughed about it with his friends, but inside he was probably totally mortified that you called him out...and that an adult cussed at him.
Dude. This is such a long comment. I had a lot of feelings about this!
I love a long and thoughtful comment! And I loved reading your perspective. If I had to bet Jelly's life on it, I would say the kid was 16. My next guess would be 15. I guess I just wanted the kid to know, if he does something shitty to a stranger, that stranger may call him out for it. I am sure he and his friend giggled when I left but I also bet I embarrassed him and he felt like an idiot at least for a split second. The look on his face... he didn't look smug. It was like an "oh shit I got caught" face. Ahhh. I know I'm a teacher and probably shouldn't be swearing at teenagers, but I figured he has surely heard worse language before.
DeleteOh, I'm sure he has too. Maybe the shock of being sworn at by an adult will help him get his act together!!
Delete