Pages

Friday, January 29, 2016

Runfessions!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Marcia @ Marcia's Healthy Slice hosts a Runfessions link up on the last Friday of every month. Be sure to check out Marcia's blog and some of the other wonderful blogs that do the Runfessions link up!


Okay, so I can't really think of ANYTHING I need to "Runfess" right now, so I am going to have to think back... waaaay back! I'm sure I can come up with something!


Actually for some reason, most of the things I am Runfessing today are kind of gross. Read on at your own risk. And if you are new to my blog, please be advised that I don't get this raunchy every day. Come back! I swear there are many lovely things I talk about that aren't gross!


Note: I have no clue why #2 and #3 are tiny. Get out your magnifying glass. I tried to fix it in the html but that didn't even work!!!

1. Runfession #1: When I am running a marathon, instead of waiting in line for the port o john, I will go behind a tree. There have been times I've simply ducked behind a port 'o john because I had a PR to catch and I wasn't going to waste precious seconds standing in line!

2. Runfession #2: When I trained for my very first marathon, I only ran once or twice during the week, but I always did my long run. The rest of the time, I was on the elliptical. My philosophy? I was afraid I would get sick of running! I know that is ridiculous, and I don't advise anyone to adopt the strategy I used.


3. Runfession #3: At the Philadelphia Marathon, I got snot rocketed on by a guy wearing American flag shorts. I WAS SO PISSED. I am not against snot rocketing at all (even though I don't really know how to do it), but I am against snot rocketing without looking to see if there is an innocent person in your path!


4. Runfession #4: This next one happened during the marathon in which I hold my current PR. (Actually now is a good time to tell the couple of MEN who read my blog to NOT READ ANY FURTHER OR YOU WILL BE SCARRED FOR LIFE!!!) I got my period the morning of the race and around Mile 19, I could just tell my tampon needed to come out. I was scared I was going to get toxic shock syndrome or something! This was at the Harrisburg Marathon, and at that point in the race I was back in the Wildwood Hills- a paved trail through woods. There was no one around, so when I approached a trash can, I stuck my hand up my shorts, ripped out my tampon, and threw it in the trash can without even breaking my stride. Somehow I managed to finish the race without any blood running down my leg! But at that point my body had probably shut down any activity that wasn't related to running... which most likely included the shedding of my uterine lining.

What are your Runfessions today?
Have you ever been snot rocketed on?
Where is the most public place you have urinated?
Any gross running + period stories?

50 comments:

  1. I have not been snot rocketed but I do snot rocket on my bike. Of course I always look before I take action. That is really gross you got hit by that. I might never recover. I have no problem going pee behind a tree. I am not even super concerned if people kind of see me. I mean, really--what's the big deal!? I would rather go behind a tree than in the port 'o potty. They are so nasty. I don't have any gross period stories but last summer I was on a Rx that gave me really bad GI issues and on one run I basically pooped my pants--not terrible but enough they went directly into the trash. I couldn't even deal with them....LOL.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL thank you for sharing that you pooped your pants! I feel closer to you now. :) I have never actually pooped mine BUT I came really freaking close one morning.

      Delete
  2. Wow! I'm in awe of your, um, removal prowess! It never occurred to me to just go behind a porta potty. That would've been a better option than holding it for 26 miles like I did in Twin Cities. Thanks for linking up!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for hosting! :)

      Yah, squat behind. No one cares.

      Delete
  3. You are not doubt a talented runner to be able to do some of these things! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now you see why I don't understand how you don't want to squat and pee, because that has been the least of my worries. ;)

      Delete
  4. OMG you have me totally laughing out loud. The snot rocket, the tampon... I can just picture it.
    I will pee anywhere and one of my skills is that I pee fast. Like in 10 seconds. I have never understood why people take so long in the toilets...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ooh a fast pee-er! That is a good skill to have.

      Delete
    2. I am in the speedy pee camp, too!

      Delete
  5. OMG Meg! The last runfession is the best story I've ever heard!! I can't believe you did that! Seriously, you're a rockstar!

    ReplyDelete
  6. These are really funny! I love it. I've definitely had a few running period mishaps. My most public urination moment was on a highway in Montana. There were no public restrooms for a long time, so I just went on the side of the road with tons of people going by.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Having to go on a road trip when there is no bathroom in sight is horrible! That happened to me once while stuck in traffic. I peed in a coffee cup.

      Delete
  7. I have a REALLY gross period story but I'll FB message it to you instead. And the 5K that I ran in Phoenix, the guy in front of me kept snot rocketing out and the backspray would hit me every single time and there was nothing I could do about it.

    ReplyDelete
  8. OMG the snot rocket...I'm so sorry that happened to you. That is one of my worst fears in a race. I would puke.

    The tampon story...I am speechless...other than to say that I bow in extreme awe of your MAD SKILLS. Seriously who the heck can do that without needing to stop? Amazing! I really hope I don't get my period at my marathon but I just have a feeling I'm going to, because I've never had it in a big goal race and I feel like I'm "due".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am glad I didn't gross yas all out with the tampon story. I have seriously only told that story to two people. Paul doesn't even know and I don't plan on telling him cause I know what he would say. He'd say "WHY DID YOU TELL ME THAT!?" haha.

      Delete
  9. Bahahahahahah best post of the day!!! Okay so I definitely do #1 on your list alllll the time. And the grossest running related things I've ever done (read at your own risk) involve running a marathon without a tampon bc I didn't have one (luckily the stress of that must have terrified my body into cooperating that day and it delayed my period until the next day). The other is probably something I should never admit to but lets just say involves getting to the start of a race REALLY early, a parking deck with no bathrooms and a Tupperware container. I feel like you can use your imagination. Hint: I didn't just have to pee.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OMGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is it gross that I want to hear more about that story???? That is so so so so funny. :) I hope you wear that as a badge of honor.

      Delete
  10. Girl, you've got enviable skills! I have to say #3 is so much more gross that #4. LOL. I don't do snot. I'm be heaving, actually. Thanks for keeping it real.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, snot is disgusting. :)

      I try to keep it real over here. :)

      Delete
  11. I thought about going behind a tree during the Miami Half because the line was so long but there weren't any trees nearby!!! I waited FOUR MINUTES at the mile 2 port o potty line :( What a waste of four minutes not just in the race but in my life! Argh!

    That tampon story is crazy. I think I would have done the same thing, but I would have been so nervous about leakage!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was a little nervous but you know the last 7 miles of a marathon there are worse things than period blood running down your leg.

      Next time you have to wait for the port o john take a page from my book and pee behind it!

      Delete
  12. I'm pretty impressed by your ability to remove a tampon mid-run! I do know that feeling of just needing it OUT though!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We could all do it if we had to. You know how around mile 18 of a marathon nothing else really matters? It's like you're drunk. Rip a tampon out? No problem!

      Delete
  13. Now that tampon removal deserves some kind of an award! Wow! Great job!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And an example of something a guy would never have to take into consideration!

      Delete
  14. Lol, oh boy!! I have to say I've never been able to squat somewhere while on a run, I just think logistically I'd make a mess. Getting your period on race day, one of my biggest fears!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No way you could squat! Practice in your backyard.

      Delete
  15. Oh my gosh! I cannot even believe that last one. Nice job dealing with that so flawlessly!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Did you say anything to the snot rocket guy? I would be so pissed and I wouldn't be able to hold my tongue!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No I did not. I was really young at the time. If that happened now I would say something for sure. Hard to believe, but I wasn't as outspoken 10 years ago as I am now!! ;)

      Delete
  17. I am going to be completely honest with you: I have totally done number 4 before, just not during a race...lol.

    ReplyDelete
  18. When there's a PR on the line, EVERYTHING is a bathroom. Just sayin'.

    And, AWESOME on the tampon removal. Even if I'd had to witness it firsthand, I couldn't possibly be mad. That's just plain impressive.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree about your bathroom comment!

      I feel like I couldn't blame someone either. ;)

      Delete
  19. LOL!!! When I got to that last one I almost spit out my breakfast (laughing)!! Of course you didn't break your stride, you rocked it! As a side note, I wear a cup, which is a gross concept, but super comfortable and gets the job done. Never thought I would even try one, but I do like it when running.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow I never even heard of a cup. I will have to look into that.

      Delete
    2. Softcup (softcup.com)! Diva Cup is also a popular one, but it looks a lot different than Softcup.

      Delete
    3. I checked out the website for a minute. Wow this would really come in handy when teaching!

      Delete
  20. You know with all these stories about runners ducking behind things, it's a wonder I never see them out peeing behind things while I am driving.

    Today I made some yellow snow. :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. A funny read for sure! I'm laughing more because I know that the men did not stop reading after they were warned!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Wow, now that's REAL! (and very funny LOL). That last one...multi-tasking at its finest ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  23. BAHAHAHA!!! New to your blog, and #3 made me LOL for real!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for stopping by :) Yes I will never forget that moment.

      Delete
  24. This is fabulous. I am a "pee at every opportunity" person. Including during triathlons. I always laugh when people speak out against one piece tri suits because they're harder to get off for a potty break. Unless I'm going #2, it's happening on the fly. You're already wet and sweaty and gross from the lake or river water, what's the difference?

    ReplyDelete