I had a freeing moment the other night and I wanted to share it with you.
I was driving home from Philly late on Sunday. I had just spent the evening with my friend Maggie and we got to see Terry Gross speak. It was a fun night, but long, and I was starving by the time I hopped in the car to head home. Starving and super duper tired. I needed food and caffeine to wake me up for the almost two hour drive I had ahead of me.
At the first rest stop I saw, I pulled in. It was relatively empty and there were only two places open- Starbucks and Burger King. I am pretty sure I could have gotten a fresh sandwich at Starbucks that would fit into most people's definition of a "healthy" dinner. But I didn't want it. I smelled the spicy chicken and fries coming from Burger King and that's what I wanted!
So I got it!
I had no guilt, no regrets. No worries that I would get "fat". No inclinations that the rest of the night would just turn into a binge fest because I already was "bad" and the day was "ruined" so I may as well just stuff my face. NONE OF THAT.
It was SO FREEING!!!!
I was eating a JUNKY MEAL just for the pure pleasure of eating it. AND I DIDN'T CARE!!!!
The sandwich was delicious and spicy. There was mayo on it, which I don't normally eat, but it was really good on this sandwich. I ate most of the fries, but not all of them because I got full. I didn't feel the need to shove all the fries in my mouth.
"You can never have fries again! You fucked up tonight, so tomorrow and for the rest of your life you will eat healthy!" my inner voice used to say.
"I will eat fries again if I want them, I don't need to go crazy tonight," my inner voice now says.
I even had a HUGE Coke Zero! I know, I have essentially eliminated fake sugary drinks from my diet. I haven't had one since I posted about it back on August 1st. That's a long time, and I'm proud of it. But I'm also proud that I could have a diet soda, enjoy it, and not feel "addicted" again.
To end this tirade, or whatever you want to call it, I'd like to quote one of my blog readers, Susan. She has a degree in nutrition and left a great comment on one of my posts. She said, "In fact, to look at any exercise and eating program on a daily basis is way to myopic. You must step back and see the bigger picture."
INDEED!
Life will go on.
Can you relate to anything I covered in this post?
Awesome...lol. :) I had a similar experience on Sunday late afternoon post race, post 3 hour appointment at the apple store and I was Starrrrrving! I hit up quiznos and got the large sub and the large pizza!
ReplyDeleteI bet that tasted so good after a cold rainy race!
DeleteYEEEEEES!! This makes me happy. Knowing that eating that stuff every now and then is ok is a wonderful thing.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had figured it all out years ago! But some things take time...
DeleteThat is a really big moment! So awesome!!!! I had a similar moment when we were on vacation in October... I had a can of real coke, not diet coke or coke zero! It was the FIRST time I had regular soda in 15+ years. Just the idea of regular, calorie-filled soda used to make me feel ragey inside. If a place didn't offer unsweet iced tea, bottles of water or diet soda it would ruin my whole day as sad as that sounds. In London I just ordered the can of coke and drank it. The flavor was just as weird and kind of disgusting as I remembered it to be, but I drank it and it didn't ruin my day! Adam didn't say anything at the time, but later on he told me he noticed and that he was proud of me. :)
ReplyDeleteI really like Susan's quote!
Kristina, that is AWESOME! I can relate to those feelings you had. What a good place to be in that you could drink it and just move on with your day! And so sweet that Adam noticed. :)
DeleteI don't feel guilty about things I eat either. I will just run an extra mile the next day:) -L
ReplyDeleteAwesome. :)
DeleteMy motto--Everything in moderation. Especially noting that my kids are at the age where they notice, and I think that it is the healthiest advice. We tend to eat healthy and avoid processed foods due to numerous allergies in our household, gluten (sensitivity), red dye, chocolate, tree nuts...
ReplyDeleteSometimes, fast food happens. (and yes, while I am eating it, I enjoy it)
Moderation is so key! And like Sue said, looking at the "big picture". Even an entire day of unhealthy eating isn't a huge deal if one normally eats healthy.
DeleteI was just loving reading this and then.....you quoted me! I've been published. LOL.
ReplyDeleteBut really it does just come down to that. I think we can all agree that we work HARD -- we run, we spin, we swim, we weight train, we yoga.....and we eat healthy.
But every once in awhile (for me that generally means whatever night we go out on the weekend) just let go and have fun and enjoy. The result will not be detrimental. In fact, in my opinion, the result will be "wow, so this is what it feels to let up some control and enjoy".
I promise you this: if you found out your life was to end tomorrow you would think about the times you enjoyed your life. Not about how much working out and eating healthy you did.
Find your BALANCE!
Hugs to you, Meg. My soul sista!!
You are a wealth of information, Sue! I hope everyone reads your comments. :)
DeleteWooHoo!!! I love this for many reasons. Mostly I love it because I can tell that this is a huge step and progress for you!! And, I love it because I love Burger King (and Taco Bell and Sonic and....) - if I let myself I could eat fast food multiple times a week but I don't (anymore!).
ReplyDeleteHey there is no shame in enjoying fast food! Some fast food is gross to me, but sometimes I CRAVE gross food haha. Like have you ever craved a greasy hot dog??? So gross, but I bet you I crave one once every couple years.
DeleteI have a greasy hot dog at every football, baseball and basketball game we go to. Nothing like a greasy dog + a cold beer!
DeleteGood for you!! Usually I eat whatever I want without feeling guilty...as long as I avoid weighing myself, I pretty much don't believe in food shame!! I'm glad you enjoyed your junk meal with no strings attached!
ReplyDelete